When I was a young lady - in high school we watched a film on the Holocaust in one of our classes. I don't remember a whole lot about it, but I do remember being very frightened about the image that stayed in my mind. The shot I remember was women standing by the side of the road, crying their hands up, screaming in heart pain... their children being loaded up in trucks, taken from them...
After I had Emily, and after I was married... I remembered again this image and a fear welled up inside of me. Now I was part of a family, what if this would be me and my baby? At a time when Curt and I were talking about life I told him about the film shot that haunted my mind, told him I was afraid. What he told me was that something like this would probably never happen again in America... people would stand up, we have learned a lot sense that awful time. The relief I felt was instant as he held me a peace came over me and I thanked him. It made a difference in me - I decided I would not live in fear. At this time I thought the peace I felt was from Curt and I talking and him giving me assurance. I didn't understand that Curt was a husband comforting his wife but the great peace I felt was the Holy Spirit.
Today in church Pastor Wayne talked about the persecuted church. He showed a picture of two teenage girls in Egypt embracing and tears rolling down their cheeks, they were in a church and mobsters were burning and killing Christians who had come to worship, another group of criminals burning the homes of those attending church. He used it to explain to the conferments that the fact they were joining the church was not a small thing - it is like taking a wedding vow, you are saying "I do" to Christ and reaffirming your baptism. You are not asking for an easy life, you are telling others that you choose to follow Christ - when things are good, and when they are not.
During second service Pastor talked about the persecuted church in China. He told about how they had found this bible hidden in a wall that had the names of followers of Christ in it. They found three of the names listed and killed them...
It all came back and flooded my mind in such an urgency that I would need to share what I could of a conversation I had with Lacey about this same story.
Lacey and I were talking about this same bible, the names of Christians were sought out. They were asked to denounce their belief in Christ in front of them all and their children... if they didn't their children would be killed on the spot. They said nothing...
and the mother looked at her child and said...
"I will see you tonight in Heaven."
As her baby's life was taken by a human on this earth this mother handed her baby to Christ. His tears flowing over a mother who stood in faith.
Lacey said "I want to know a love like this, I am not afraid anymore"
and I knew in this moment... just what she was talking about. Fear is not from the Lord.
The relief I felt was instant.
I knew it was the Holy Spirit - that we are a part of something so much greater than we can even imagine. That our children are His children - we need not be afraid. We stand in faith and pray for His Grace to cover us as we carry on and share what we have learned.
AMEN
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